nagagawa ng iang taong bored
June 24, 2009Good morning beautiful how was your night
Mine was wonderful with you by my side
And when I opened my eyes and see your sweet face
Its a good morning beautiful day
nagising ako sa kantang ito… kaya nakangiti ako ng pumasok sa office.
sino ba naman ang hindi matutuwa, kung pagkagising mo pa lang ay sumalubong na agad sa ‘yo ang ganito? ewan ko na lang kung hindi ka mapa “GOOOOOODDDDD MMMMOOORRRNNNNIIIINNNGGGGG!!!!” 
ang masasabi ko lang, kahit sa office eh sinira ng bongga ang aking momentum, naiisip ko lang tong kantang ‘to, bumabalik ang ngiti sa aking mga labi… 
once, i dreamed of waking up next to you,
with your sweet smile as the first thing that i would see to start my day.
but that dream was crushed by the realization that the future i have painted
was not the same picture you have in mind.
in fact, there was never a picture to begin with.
too bad, now that you wanted to paint that picture,
i can’t even lift my arm to start painting again.
30 days to live
June 23, 2009my last thirty days started last sunday…
and i made a promise, im going to live my last thirty days here on earth as if it’s my last.
yesterday, i ate everything that i could eat. hehe! that’s extraordinary coz i had this “crazy notion” of starving my self to death then PG during dinner time. yesterday was different… every minute, every hour, i was munching… yum! (buti na lang dami din food kahapon. hehe! 
)
today, im planning of cooking spaghetti. hhmmm… i miss cooking spaghetti. it’s been such a long since i tried cooking. so to mark my last 28 days here on earth, i will cook. (and that thought cheers me up. can’t wait to go home. 
)
how about you, what if you only have 30 more days left here on earth, what would you do? :)
mapaglarong tadhana
June 11, 2009naman! wala na talagang patawad si BOHAY… kung makakaskas ng asin sa sugat eh, todo-todo naman talaga… 
araw-araw na lang bang isasampal sa akin ang isang alaala from the past? ung past na pilit nilalayuan?! hihihi!
napapakanta tuloy ang sambayanang pipol ng “napakasakit, kuya eddie… ng sinapit ng aking vohay…”
stuck in a moment
June 10, 2009im stuck in a moment…
im lingering when i could just move on and never look back… i should just start anew chapter, but instead, im rereading the whole thing all over again…
i should have taken baby steps to move away from this state… but so far, i stood still, far too long than what’s necessary… now, i found myself buried, ankle-deep, in this muddy mess…
(Sabay napapakanta ng wake me up, when september ends - with a twist… with a prayer na “Lord, wish ko lang, dapat by september eh tapos na nga… 
)
confessions of an impatient bride
June 2, 2009yep, you read it right. im currently reading Rissa Singson-Kawpeng’s “Confessions of an Impatient Bride.” but wait, this is not the typical cheesy, self-help book.. this is more of a “spiritual” book for those people out there (like me) who’s constant source of frustration is the “S” word… oopppsss… before you go down the green lane, S word here refers to STATUS : SINGLE.
truth is, although i’m not a perfect Christian ( i do have my own worldly sins ), i always find solace and peace in Him. and this book talks about “Godly lessons you can learn while waiting for Mr. Right.”
thanks to sir do for giving me a signed copy of this book (naks! salamat ng madami!) and for supporting my current state of mind, that is, indeed, the wait is worth it.
wushwush
May 30, 2009relatively, i’m calm. may konting sundot at kirot, may nagbabadyang luha, pero now, medyo mas compose na ako. exactly two months ago, i’ve been down this road also. but whereas dati, para akong papel na blenender para gamitin sa paper mache, ngayon, para na lang akong bark ng puno na maya maya ay hinahataw ng palakol; pero di nabubuwal.
oo, matapang naman talaga ako. minsan nga, sobrang tapang ko, namimisinterpret as matigas na ang puso ko. pero sa totoong buhay, napakalambot ng puso ko. matigas lang ang ulo ko. MAS matigas lang ang ulo ko. i tend to complicate things when in fact it could be simplified sana. lagi akong may “left and right” views, laging may pros and cons. minsan, sa sobrang pagddwell ko sa mga bagay na yan, nakikita ko na lang sarili ko na wala na palang pagddecidan. (more…)
namamangka sa dalawang ilog
May 29, 2009kulang pa ba ang proof sa mundong ibabaw na lalabas at lalabas din ang katotohanan? kung hindi man ngayon eh, sa hinaharap? minsan nga lang, ang katotohanan, narreveal before ka pa maging handa. especially kung ikaw ung “may tinatago.” minsan pa, narreveal ito sa napakanakakatawang pangyayari.
meron akong kwento, isa na naman to sa mga napulot ko sa tabi tabi. as usual, wala akong papangalanan. mag enjoy na lang tayo at mag-isip. pwede din tumawa. pero higit sa lahat, hinahangad ko na sana, sana may mapulot tayong aral… (more…)
what if?
May 25, 2009last night, a friend informed me that a sorority sis of our friend died. i asked her how, she unfortunately failed to reply, instead, sent me a link of the girl’s FS profile. when i saw her profile pic, i suddenly felt cold… i knew the girl.
since their tambayan is just near our building, plus we usually buy our pansit there, i always see her there. or having a campus as “large yet so small”" as elbi, it is not really impossible to see people (okay, medyo magulo pero as it is, at elbi, di imposibleng di mo makikita ang mga pipol)…
but that was it… after i got over the pic and the realization that i know her, i felt……. i felt UNDISTURBED (maybe because my “good” friend AC, left me hanging with the question how she died, eh?! )… i pity her, even uttered a prayer for her and for her soul and her family but that’s it… im relatively okay after that…
this morning, i received a PM from my friend, the sis. she asked me if i knew already and said yes… i asked her how she died…
SHE WAS ONE OF THE VICTIM OF THE SUNKEN M/V COMMANDO… the boat that sunked at puerto galera…
life, as we all know, has a cruel way of reminding us how short our time here on earth is. the girl was in her prime age… but that didn’t stop death to claim her young life.
who would have thought that that would be her last travel on earth (now, i guess she’s travelling to a different dimension, and i hope that she would find peace and comfort in her final destination.)?
has she told her mama and papa how much she loves them? na-hug nya kaya mga kapatid nya, pet nya or sino man ang dapat nyang i-hug? nalinis nya ba ang table nya? nagawa nya kaya ung pinakagusto nyang gawin?
what happened to her could happen to any one of us. irregardless of age, stature, or other classification, we cannot stop LIFE to play its course on us… the challenge now is how to live our life…
cliche as it may be, i prefer to seize the moment… takot man ako sa consequences, but i learned that i can survive, with flying colors, a bruised ego and shattered dreams… and not taking risks could only mean a life full of “what ifs” and “what might have beens.” ika nga eh, “ang puso, nasusugatan man yan, gumagaling din.” parang tao lang din, masugatan man tayo eh, mabubuhay pa din naman tayo. ang mas nakakapanghinayang eh kung dumating na ang oras natin tapos puno pa din tayo ng regrets dahil sa mga bagay na di natin ginawa dahil takot tayo or we keep on putting it off for another day….
happy journey, nina. hope you’ll find peace and comfort in the arms of our Maker. you will surely be missed. but the joy, laughter, and lessons you have shared to the lives of those you have touched will be forever remembered of.
USAPANG HB
May 22, 2009Things na would truly shoot my BP to the nth level..
1. traffic… yung tipong nagmamadali ka, may hinahabol ka na oras pero parang pinaglalaruan ka ng tadhana kasi bigla ka na lang masstuck sa traffic… and pinakabadtrip pa nito ay kung nagccomute ka tapos napaka “bango” ng mga kasama mo sa sasakyan… parusa!
2. mayabang na mga taxi drivers… ung pagkasakay mo, sasabihan ka ng dagdag metro ekek tapos sabay kaskasero pa. natural na sa mga taong ngka-cab, esp. dito sa manila, na nagdadagdag naman talaga ng bayad. pero wag garapal. magbibigay pa ng amount kung magkano ang idadagdag mo. naalala ko tuloy ung sinabi ng isang officemate ko dun sa isang taxi driver “Kaya di kayo umaasenso kasi abusado kayo eh.”
3. makulit… mahaba naman pasensya ko. pwede mo akong kulitin sa isang bagay ng mga up to 3 times.pero pag lumagpas na eh, naman talga…
4. feelingera/feelingero… ung feeling eh “God’s-Gift-to-Human” sha… ung may attitude. lalo na kung di naman masyadong pinagpapala ng langit. wag na tayong balahura mga fwends… dapat alam natin kung san lang ang ating lebel ng pagffeeling. isama mo na din dito ung pagiging assuming ng sangkatauhan. masama yan. madaming namamatay at nalulugmok dahil sa kakaassume ng bagay…
5. bastos… sino bang hindi badtrip sa mga taong ganito… isama mo na dito ung mayabang at masyadong mapagmataas… may tinatawag tayong “humility.” tingnan nyo sa dictionary anong meaning kaya ng word na to.
6. insensitive… pwede na ding nahawaan na to ng sakit na tinatawag na “feeling disease.” yung tipong iniisip eh sa kanya lng umiikot ang mundo.
7. SINUNGALING… mas gusto ko pang masaktan kasi nalaman ko ang katotohanan kesa nabubuhay ako sa isang kasinungalingan. lalong ayaw na ayaw ko ung nahuli na nga, lulusot pa.
… pero ang pinakaayaw ko sa lahat na talga namang nakakapa HIGHBLOOD ng bongga sa akin ay….
MAGPAASA… yung tipong gagawa ka ng plano tapos okay na tapos biglang last minute eh di matutuloy? ang badtrip pa kung di ka magtatanong eh di mo pa malalaman na nagbago na pala lahat ng plano. ung literal na iniwan ka sa ere. yung magbibigay ka ng pangako tapos di din naman kayang tuparin. fyi lang, DI LANG SA IYO.INYO UMIIKOT ANG MUNDO NG ISANG TAO. isipin nyo, may ibang buhay at ibang bagay din na dapat gawin o planuhin ang isang tao and it’s a total waste of time and effort pag mangangako o gagawa kayo ng planong wla ka naman palang balak totohanin o tutuparin. kung di ka sure na kaya mong magdeliver, sabihin mo na agad bagao ka magplano at magpaasa, di ba?! kesa last minute eh mawwindang na lang ung other party.
so obviously eh mainit ang ulo ko. hehe…
muddled mind
May 15, 2009Should be working now, not blogging. but my soul’s so restless, and so is my mind… should i believe what i just saw? or should i wait for another “sign?”
Would I rather believe or would I rather wish (again?!)? Should I take the risk (again?! ) or should I wait for now?
I should not feel this way, I could have prepared my self… I should have known better, but I still had the faith. Now I guess I’m back to round one, to step one… And it’s more heartbreaking than ever…
Some would say it’s a blessing but for me, it’s an affirmation of a curse… I should have listened, but I chose to believe and hope otherwise… Now stubborn as I am, I just wanna lay down and and be numb…
